it just makes sense

LIL BABY JEANETTE.
Alice and Kittys birthday pressent,
from me
;)
"she must be a fucking orphan, cos shes a miserable ginger prikkk"

I miss Temeka. She is on my list of things to do.
;)
I also miss my birthday. I wish i could re-do my 16th, 17th and 18th birthday again. Best days everrr !
Although, i love this whole build up to christmas. The tree still isnt up :|. I know its early but i like it being up early.
Darkness,
flashing lights,
warmth.
(L)

Germany was thee best. I love sunshine and generally being on holiday.

Ive washed like 2 hours having my "early lunch", watching tv and now looking at pictures.
Jheeez.


The highway code is where its happening :)

Short Tempered

I love him so much.

We all have our own individual problems and even though some may be "bigger" than others, we all see our own as the worst. I guess that is because it is happening to us.

I feel like i have a few right now
but nothing compares to another and I just feel so bad for them.

It puts my own into perspective and it pisses me off when others dont take into consideration anyone elses feelings but their own.

One minute i see where things are coming from and then the next i feel like i dont want to get involved.

Its gay to say but i really do feel like ive matured a lot within the past two months and things which i used to play up to, now, dont seem like anything. Infact, i couldnt give a shit.

I still can be immiature about people and things still piss me off but i have a new way of dealing with them.

I find myself worrying a lot.
Not even necessarily about myself; more about other people. Not that I mind,
it takes me away from my own problems. Thats if you can call it a "problem" as such.
I know i have amazing friends who are there for me whatever happens but sometimes I dont feel like things are worth sharing.
I probably see it for worse than it actually is. Maybe.

Unnecessary comments are annoying. Why say them?

Remember who has always been there for you so why get up the arse of people who end up slagging you off?

Who knows.
I cant even make my own opinion up because it changes within each minute of the moment.

"if you havnt got anything nice to say - dont say it"
But what if you put a wink or a 'lol' after the statement you have just made. Do you really mean it? Or are you making light of the fact you have subtly told someone something nasty? Or is it a joke altogether for the faint hearted?
"your relationship makes me feel sick. JOKE"
...because that was nice.

I dont know why I signed up for this university thing. I didnt want to do it in the first place and i have said it sinse the just gone summer.
Ive always hated "begging friends". There is a fine difference between making friends and begging friends and im always worried about which category i fit into.
If someone wants to be my friend...then ill welcome them with open arms,
but does that mean they are begging my friendship?

Being shallow IS WEIRD.
Do you like people more for the fact that they look good/are attractive?
Or do you prefer people who dont care?

This was on a programme i watched this morning.

Listening is the key.



I dont even know myself.



Would you ever abort an un-born child?

21 questions to go.

SHOOT THE RUNNER

THIS IS WHY IM A TURNING INTO A JEALOUS, PARANOID WRECK; YOUR FEEDING IT.

I saw it.
I read it.
Now the paranoia spreads on to you;
did I read it?
Did i see it?

Now lets make up some bullshit to get you out of the sticky situation. Thats the way you handle things. Panic. Twist.

You wont read this but i dont care.

Like playing a game.

"No period, no fun"

jheeez
im toooo open.

I love you
Alice, Haz, Kitty, Lauren and Molly.
My best ones.

I know im such a cringe all the time on here but whenever i write a blog is when im feeling bare apreciative to have you lot :)))

Lets get this party started,
ready,
set,
bang.

I HATE THIS

God,
Yesterday was so lovely; jokes, memories and tea with Alice on the steps and then savacentre. I havnt laughed that much in a long time and awh :)

Last night was so lovely; dinner with Ed at the ol' cavery and then back to his for laughs and a cuddle on his LILO blow up bed ahaha.

Came home in a good mood.

Bit of tea,
Bit of Tee-v,
bed.

AGONY ALL THE NIGHT,
PAIN IN THE GOOD EAR.
20 mins of sleep...tops.

Doctors this morning at an early hour with
Dr David.
I expected a man and all my mum said when we got out was:
"She was Indian...and she had a last name like David. She MUST have married someone not Indian"
:\

BEARING IN MIND BOTH MY EARS WERE OOZING WITH 'DISCHARGE' (hate that fucking word) AND THATS ALL SHE COULD THINK OF TO SAY.
haha
in a way...this sums up MAJULIE down to a T.

To add to my oozing, pulsating and painful ears (both of them)- my phone FUCKING broke.

'please insert the correct sim card'

THAT IS THE CORRECT SIM CARD. FINE. FUCK YOU. ILL 'INSERT' A CHARGER IN YOUR BOTTOM. SEE HOW YOU LIKE THAT.

'Cannot charge battery. Please insert sony erricson charger."

¬_¬

YOU TAKING THE PISS?
I HAD TO RING LARISSA TO APOLOGISE FOR NOT TURNING UP TO DRAMA. AGAIN.
I HAD TO TEXT DANNY TO CANCEL MY DRIVING LESSON.
I HAD TO TEXT TEMEKA TO CANCEL OUR DINNER DATE...

...bearing in mind i now talk like a deaf person. Only pronouncing certain syllables.

Using a temporary phone.



Therefore, I decided to watch Jimmy Carr - telling jokes.
This was, indeed, JOKES.

Apart from the fact every time i laugh or jolt, my ears OOZ.

I HATE THE FUCKING WORD OOZ TOO.

Not in the best mood of my life, not gonna lie.

Sympathy for me?

Havnt eaten properly for like 2 weeks (hardly anything) yet i look FAT.

"who needs a six pack when you can have a barrel?"

:)

Only a real friend will tell you when your face is dirty

"Friendship doubles your joys, and divides your sorrows."

I LOVE YOU LOT MORE THAN LIFE :)

+ A MILLION BILLION MORE :D

GOD

What a prik. (not God)

Maybe it's me?
Why do we make more problems than we had already?

I dont even understand myself so fuck knows how anyone else gets me?
I am a nightmare. Thats my problem.

Cleaning sunshine - good film

Its been a while, apologies for the emo blogs haha
but now, i am happy and well chilled; finally got everything sorted.

I love the whole concept of "having a friend" and i believe that i have a bunch of "true" friends :). I feel really lucky at the moment actually. I can openly talk about anything with them and they never judge me. Also, they are all so considerate and we are so comfortable with eachother that we never take anything to heart.
(L)

Im really happy with Ed aswell :), i feel like everything is pretty perfect at the moment. Of course, there are a few ups and downs but it never really matters because it gets sorted.
No relationship is perfect and i like that. It makes it more interesting and keeps me on edge, rather than bored and settled.

I still have a few hundred essays still to write (:s) and a FAT earache, but Ashleigh and Sam are coming round in an hour or so, so im going to tidy my room and maybe write one essay :)
Simple things please me and ive become obsessed with television.

I hope this feeling lasts to be honest because there is nothing worse than feeling insecure, sad or angry.
On the other hand, i LOVE being emotional. I hate the thought of crying but at the time its such a relief.

I cant wait until christmas. All i want to do is buy myself or someone else a party dress and have a lovely night out :)))
We are putting the christmas tree up next week seeing as we have a "new" living room (L).

Free periods with Alice make me laugh more than anything :) Discussing baby names.
JEANETTE.

Thats my nans name :)

Im always in a "walking to heaven" mood,
feeling the sunshine in the cold,
this is happiness.

swollen eyes

What a horrible week.
I havnt been myself
and just been generally emotional. Which has not done me justice.
However, i have got loads done and got loads off my chest.

Had my hair cut today and i really like it. I also got the chance to dress up in sequins and BARE makeup for the bridge house. mmmm cocktails.

Things are not annoying me now. Maybe its because ive got everything out and had the fattest cry of my life.
Cried all day actually aha
rather pathetic but i had a good reason because of what happened.

Fingers crossed things will be good again.

can not wait until christmas.

sequins

Had a chilled Thursday night
sorted for tomorrow
bit of Bromley
clothes rail and trousers (Y)
sequins
yep

x
o

meehhh

Its like running from a firework- the chance of getting hit.

Im going to make this blog private soon. I dont like everyone reading this and im going to mainly use it instead of a diary for the simple reason that i can never be bothered to write; typing is easier.

People are so rude and expect too much.
Why try so hard to be something you are not. I've stopped making such an effort now. Im fed up with contradiction and all that jazz.
I've stopped caring about what people think.
Trying hard at school has become important and I'm determined to get my EMA for once haha.

My list is slowly getting crossed off and I'm definitely getting there.
I want a nice job for christmas, it doesnt necessarily have to be a christmas job; I just want the whole late christmasy evenings with the decorations.

Maaan i love clothes
and shoes
and cheap coats
and weird bags.

I feel like ive matured a bit recently and not going to piss about anymore.

I also feel like i bore people to the point that they cant be bothered to talk to me anymore. Maybe i am boring? greatt.
Im losing friends that i dont want to.
All it is that i dont want to keep going out and spending money on a load of bollox. I'm going out and getting dressed up and not needing a coat. EMOTIONAL

One of them moods.
Probably being boring again.

2 in 1

So
i am scared about going into school tomorrow;
period 1: Havnt read anymore of the book.
Period 2: I think ive borrowed and lost an expensice art book, my homework has been sent about 2 mins ago (2 weeks late) AND i havnt done a mood board.
Period 3: Cant find where i saved the essay IVE ACTUALLY DONE about shakespearian shizzle and i think im gna have to do it again :'(
period 4: free...BUT have to do graphics/english work
period 5: Havnt finished the essays..still have 1 and a half to do

:'(
and i HAVE to go in because i get EMA now.
GOD MAN

prepare
because im gonna be in a mess ahaha

ahh well
life goes on.
Alice is going to be pleased...two blogs in one night. WTF.

I cut Eds hair...he looks like a sexy mofo ;)

peace and quiet
night
x
o

i'd like to dedicate this to Alice Jones

I have become so lazy; i did no homework/coursework last week.

I also turn into a jelous bitch when im drunk lol...well...maybe not a bitch but certainly too jelous when there is probably no need.

Had a lovely day today and i always feel so much better once ive got something done, even if it is one essay that should have been done 5 weeks ago. The point is i got it done.

Kitty is one of the only people who recognises that im actually RUBBISH at getting important things done. She said she is going to tell my mother to take my internet out of my room haha
here is a perfect example
at this moment in time
im texting,
talking to alice on facebook chat,
stalking on facebook,
on twitter
AND
doing this.
What a nightmare,
all this when i should be doing an essay for mr Griffin and some graphics work.
I NEED to work hard this week and get back ontop of things because i am really getting LOW LOW LOW

I desperately want to get into journalism when i get older; ive finally found what i want to do and what i aspire to be.
I love knowing about things and finding out.
I also am inlove with a few celebrities; Ed saves me the showBIZ page every day in the SUN newspaper ahaha.

Money is slowly coming but im GUTTED about not getting the Harrads elf job. They said i was too late with an aplication but they are going to consider me another time.
Im feeling working in a cafe? or somewhere like that?
TIPS.

woah...another follower on TWITTER ;)
i adore the word TWEET ahaha
:D

Now my lungs are clear, im going to start running &/or swimming. I want to be as fit as a fiddle....and im also ignoring the fact ive literally just sat with Phoebe and pigged out on about 10000000000000000000000000000 pringles. I dont even like pringles
GOD DAMNIT!

Ok now i will finish
and go write some of an essay
or do some graphics essay thing

TO DO
- First essay about Alex
- Last essay about the ending, english/american ending
- Graphics essay about modern art/new design
- Mood board for modern art/new design
- 8 Initial design ideas
- finish final specification for graphics folder
- research for graphics folder
- Finish reading the handmaids tale
- do UCAS form
- finish and perfect personal statement

I KNOW! SO MUCH!

and tonight i have to cut Eddy Bubbles hair lol
which im quite looking forward to
so instead of doing all this, ive also been looking at about 20 million mens hair styles lol
GOD!
right
tonight i need to do one essay for english
and
the graphics thing about modern art.

HEY HO
LETS GO


ALICE IS A SEXY MOFO
(L)
X
O